#41: Addicts and Their Half Truths
Heather and Zoe start 2026 by unpacking addiction, honesty, and the quiet half-truths that shape relationships in sobriety. They talk mental health after the holidays, navigating shame and trust with partners, and how vulnerability shows up when addicts avoid telling the full story—not out of malice, but fear. The conversation weaves through Dry January, power dynamics, celebrity accountability, and why believing people matters, offering an unfiltered look at recovery, relationships, and learning to tell the truth without self-destruction.
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Addicts and Their Half Truths: Transcript
Heather : [00:00:00] This podcast covers sensitive topics that may be difficult for some listeners. Please take care while listening.
Welcome back to Girl Undrunk. I'm Heather. And I'm Zoe. And this is our first podcast of 2026.
Zoe: I haven't seen this one in two whole weeks. I missed you. I missed you too. Let's cheers to that. Cheers. Here we go guys. So happy to be back.
Heather : Mm-hmm.
Zoe: How's your mental health? Oh, what did you say on the New Year's episode of your mental Health?
Was.
Heather : Four,
Zoe: three. Yeah. Three.
Heather : I think my mental health is like a five. Okay. I think [00:01:00] I, I know in my soul I still have like a brain flu. Mm-hmm. Which is like depression. It's like, kind of like the way I've been describing it recently. Yeah. Is like getting the flu. Yeah. But for your brain. Yeah. Like your mental health.
So I know I'm still kind of sick, but I am coming out of it. Mm-hmm. But like, I can't go run a marathon right now or like exhaust myself because I'll just get more sick. How's your mental?
Zoe: My mental, I've gotta say it's good. I gotta say we're doing good over here.
Heather : It was so funny, Zoe posted something on Instagram, like a picture of us on FaceTime and she is like one half of Girl Undrunk is having the best week of their life, and the other half is just fucking in hell.
Like I know, but that's okay. Honestly. Oh, so sorry. Oh, it's okay. It felt good to me. I could just let you talk about your mental health, but no, I'll interrupt
Zoe: you. I think I would give my mental health like maybe an 8.5. That's great. Yeah. I was [00:02:00] listening into someone's conversation yesterday at other ship, like it was two bros talking about like how their holidays were and one of them was like, yeah, like I was just resting for like four days from like the 25th to the 29th.
It was just so restful. I slept, I just relaxed. I'm like, fuck, my holidays were not restful or relaxing. There was a lot to get done, lots of families to see.
Heather : Mm-hmm.
Zoe: But it was still like. A lot of fun.
Heather : Yeah.
Zoe: Um, but yeah, so like my holidays weren't relaxing at all, but do you wanna say why? Because I spent the holidays with my boyfriend.
Mm-hmm. And. His parents are divorced, so there's so many families to go see. His mom's, his stepdad's family, his dad's, both of the grandparents. Like there's just a lot of houses. Yeah. I think we went to five different houses in one day in 20. Oh, in the span of 24 hours we went to five different houses. Oh no.
Which is insane. No, no. Um. And my boyfriend [00:03:00] is moving to the city, moving in with me.
Heather : Mm-hmm.
Zoe: And we packed up his whole house and it's a tiny house. Yeah. But that man has a lot of shit. Yeah. And a sentimental brother. He's a sentimental brother. Yeah. Which I am not at all. I'm not sentimental at all. I'm like, Hey, have you ever kept a birthday card?
No.
Heather : No. I'm not sentimental. Sometimes with clothes I'm like. I, I know if I get rid of this, I'm gonna need it.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : Again, but no, I've never, I'm, I have a lot of shit in my house. Yeah. And like, my drawers are messy, but it's, nothing is sentimental. But when you are, when it's time for you to clean out those drawers, you're like, okay, get it all out.
Oh my God. If a bulldozer came in here and just everything I, you'd be like, okay, great. I'll take my bear. Yeah. I'll take my son. Mm-hmm. Leave this room as is. Yeah. And then bulldoze. Yeah, and then bulldoze. I'm like,
Zoe: there are caveats, but yeah, go ahead. Take it. Yeah. So I think like it, it took us a while to pack up the house.
There's like a real estate guy that came in to take [00:04:00] photos and now they're like showing the place.
Heather : Is he renting it or selling it?
Zoe: Yeah, he's renting it out. Renting rent. Yeah. That's good. That's nice. So. I, it's funny too, because I thought that we were like gonna get rid of like some hats, some socks, you know?
Mm-hmm. He didn't tell me that there was. Piles and piles of shit that we had to go through. I'm like, when were you, he trapped you. When were you gonna fucking tell me? Yeah. I opened one box and I'm like, oh, okay. And then I opened another box. I go, eventually I've opened 30 boxes. I was like, what point were you gonna tell me that you have a lot of shit that you need to get rid of?
He was like, no, I wasn't gonna, I would just like let you open them all.
Heather : I. Love addicts and they're half truths. And then there's this dichotomy with addicts where it's like, when we get sober, we really trust. We trust a lot and we mm-hmm. Because we take people at face value because you have to, because they deserve that.
And it's just good. But then we forget that addicts are half truthers. Yeah. Not necessarily liars. Half [00:05:00] truthers. Yeah. But then it's like, I trust you to tell me that your house is full of stuff. Yeah. You are half a liar, so shit.
Zoe: Well, I did, my boyfriend is an addict as well. He's almost a year sober. I was like, I'm a little bit frustrated that I didn't know.
Yeah. I was gonna spend 12 hours Yeah. Of this Sunday cleaning and organizing and throwing out stuff and going to Goodwill five times. Like I would've liked to know that this ha was gonna be how my Sunday was gonna be.
Heather : Yeah.
Zoe: Like if I just knew, it's fine. But the fact that he didn't tell me I was a little bit pissed off, but I think he didn't tell me because he was ashamed and embarrassed and blah blah.
Okay. That's what I was gonna
Heather : ask if you put yourself in his shoes. Yeah. Why? Yeah. Do you think that's what it was? He was embarrassed. Totally. He
Zoe: told, he said that after, he was like, I was just like afraid to say, because I'm embarrassed that I couldn't do that. Mm-hmm. That's what he said too. Like, I couldn't have done this without you.
Like he's, he's tried to get rid of shit before, but he gets overwhelmed. Um, so I'm glad that I did help him with that. Yeah. [00:06:00] It felt like I'm the best girlfriend ever, truly. But he did, he like built. A closet in my condo two weeks before that and painted all the walls and refreshened the house for me. So it's like he did that for me.
So like, I can help you clean out your house, you know? Yeah.
Heather : Yes. I wonder moving forward, if this is like not your responsibility, but now that you know this, it's like mm-hmm. If we have something to do, could you please tell me how much it is? Yeah. Because I, I, I wonder because I think I'm quite like him in a lot of respects.
Mm-hmm. Not, of course we're very different, but like little isms like that, and it's like, I wanna tell you how bad it is, but I don't actually want it to be that bad, so I don't want it, I don't want You can't even admit it to yourself. Right, right. Yeah. And it's really. Hard and then it ends up making us look like bad or feel bad, or like liars, but it's like, oh my God.
The whole time I was trying to protect. Me and you. Mm-hmm. And then it was like, oh [00:07:00] fuck. Eventually I have to rip the bandaid. It's like the anticipation Yeah. Is so daunting. You Yeah. But like when I'm in
Zoe: your closet and there's 12 shoe boxes and I'm just like, keep opening them. Yeah. Like, that's the point where you say, this is gonna be a full day job, babe.
Yeah, yeah. Like I trapped, now I'm trapped. There's. Shoebox is falling onto my face. He's locked the door. You're in there for 12 hours. Like the housemaid. Oh no, it wasn't that bad guys. I'm exaggerating a little bit and like I love you babe. But,
Heather : but also it is a lot like it my, if you came looking at my closets too, you'd be like, why?
Zoe: Why are you like this? Well, yeah, and I think I just like would've loved a heads up. We got it done. But yeah, we, um, there was one time I, he gave me a drop to put everything in a suitcase and so I put everything in the suitcase. Mm-hmm. I'm not an organized packer. Oh. I am. And he like yelled at me for not packing everything.
Right.
Heather : I'm gonna lie to you about how much shit there is to do this weekend, and you have [00:08:00] to do everything perfectly or we're gonna have a real issue here.
Zoe: Literally no. I love him. I, I don't do things slowly. I do things really quickly and just shove them places. Like I get, I don't do them perfectly. I get things done.
I don't do them perfectly. He doesn't get things all the way done, but he does them perfectly interesting. So I think that's like where, I didn't know that until this past. A couple weeks too. It's like control,
Heather : right? It's like this is all chaos and now I really need to fixate on controlling this. Yeah. So I don't feel like such a fucking piece of shit.
Exactly. Yeah. And you're like, okay, I'm gonna do it my way, babe. Yeah. 'cause you dunno what's going on. Well,
Zoe: no, like now I, I did like. Learn to pack properly and like roll clothes and shit. I guess like, I don't know. I'm still gonna pack my way, my clothes, my way. He can do what he fucking wants. Yeah, but
Heather : just put it all into a ball and then we just jam it and then I'll sit on the suitcase and you just,
Zoe: that's another thing, girls, we jam in clothes jam to the brim jam.
He wasn't jamming in [00:09:00] clothes. I was like, babe, you can throw in five more shirts there. Easy. Oh, we gotta be jamming.
Heather : You gotta jam, you gotta do the socks, you gotta put the socks in the shoes and the underwear in the socks in the shoes. Yeah.
Zoe: But
Heather : yeah,
Zoe: like that was really fun. Mm-hmm. I think that we've gotten closer.
That's another thing I wanted to say. When he was like being all vulnerable and was saying like, I was embarrassed to tell you how much stuff I have, blah, blah, blah. I was like, fuck. Well, I need to tell you something embarrassing and vulnerable too.
Heather : Yeah. Well, you must, what is it?
Zoe: That I had a stinky vagina.
Oh. Oh my God. I'm so proud of you for saying that on the pod. Yeah. Well, I posted my fucking boric acid on the Instagram, so I'm like, I have to boric acid. Is that what it is? That's what, well, that's what Maddie told me to get. I don't like that word. We have the worst words. Literally yeast. Yeast. I hate the yeast.
I hate the yeast. Relax. So yeah, we had sex like one time and then it was like smelly and I didn't say anything.
Heather : Mm-hmm. And then, but you smelt it the first time?
Zoe: Yeah. Okay. Second time. And its smelled like pennies. You said [00:10:00] it was like, it was like irony.
Heather : Mm-hmm.
Zoe: Slash pussy. Like, like smelly pussy. Okay,
Heather : okay.
Like
Zoe: not great.
Heather : Yeah. And you're, you noticed it right away. You're like, this is not, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is not normal.
Zoe: And then I didn't say anything and then we had sex again hoping that it was just gonna be fine. Well, it's been like a long day. You've been moving, there's stress. It's Christmas. Yeah.
Maybe I just need to have a shower. Listen. And then it was smelly again. Uhhuh, and then like. The next day was the packing, and he was being all like open and honest, and I was like, yeah, well. I know that my pussy has been smelling. Oh my
Heather : God, that is so great that you had something to offer.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : Like just as embarrassing and shameful.
Yeah. You know?
Zoe: Well, he was like, thank you for bringing it up, because I didn't know how to tell you.
Heather : Yeah. He's like, now I'm packing up my whole life and moving in with this girl with a stinky vagina. Now what am I gonna do? You're both just going [00:11:00] through it. No, literally. Okay, so then what happened?
Zoe: You panicked.
Well, I then looked up online. Mm-hmm. Like why? My pussy's probably smelly and. It's probably just a side effect of stopping birth control.
Heather : Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what you texted me. Yeah. I was like, oh yeah, that makes so much sense. Yeah.
Zoe: But when you stop birth control you, like it takes a while for your hormones to balance out again.
Mm-hmm. And at that point, you are more susceptible to yeast infections. Okay. Just 'cause things are imbalanced. Yeah. So I think after I told him like, yo, I know my pussy smells. I'm sorry. I think it's probably my birth control. And he noticed, yeah. He was like, yeah, you smell. I didn't know how to tell you.
Heather : Did he go down on you?
Zoe: No. Okay. He didn't. Yeah. Yeah.
Heather : No, I think that's fair.
Zoe: Yeah. No, but I wouldn't wanna go down. Does he
Heather : always go down on you every time you have sex?
Zoe: Not every time. Okay.
Heather : So it wasn't like at least avoiding it. Yeah.
Zoe: Yeah. But no, this is so embarrassing. But I was on top of [00:12:00] him, Uhhuh and he was laying down
Heather : Uhhuh
Zoe: and like he, like, he came up to just like make out with me and like kiss me instead of wanting to be down there.
'cause his head was like.
Heather : Oh, the line with the pussy smell. Wow. And at that point, well now you're mixing with him too. And those, oh man.
Zoe: At that point, when he got up, I knew that he could smell it. Yeah. Because, uh, and he was honestly making some weird faces.
Heather : I mean,
Zoe: he's
Heather : a soldier
Zoe: fought war. Okay. So you went to the pharmacy, you got, well, at first I wasn't gonna go to the pharmacy right away.
So after I told him, I was like, yeah, I'm just gonna wait, wait a couple days and if it doesn't go away then I'll go to a walk-in or whatever. Yeah. But then I told Maddie and Maddie was like, just go get some boric acid right now. And then I went to shoppers. I said, put
Heather : your
Zoe: elbow inside yourself
Heather : and
Zoe: see if
Heather : you have a tampon of pan.
I
Zoe: honestly did that as well. Yeah. I went to, when I was in the shower, I went up there and felt no cotton, so I was fine. That's good. And yeah, and then I ended up going to shoppers and just [00:13:00] getting the boric acid. And now my pussy smells amazing again. Like did it work right away, like overnight? Probably like two days after I did the boric acid repository.
Yeah. Shoved it up there. Okay. And then, okay, two days after, I was like, okay, let's try to have sex again. Uhhuh, because I didn't even wanna have sex when I was smelling like that because I was like, I don't feel good about myself. Well, you don't wanna smell it either. You're like, that's not sexy. I know it.
It's not great. No, it doesn't get me in the mood. No. So I was like, I gave him head once he came in my. You know, mouth.
But
this is not a sex podcast, by the way. I love you. I missed you. Maybe we should move in together. Just kidding. I think so too.
Heather : We have essentially
Zoe: lived
Heather : together.
Zoe: Okay. And yeah, then it And we Good. Damn. Okay. That's good to know. Yeah. How was your holidays like seeing your family? Family was everything. Was family good?
Heather : Oh yeah. Oh my God. [00:14:00] Okay. So, uh, Christmas was great, honestly, like I went to Ottawa with my sister to see my mom. This was the first Christmas that my parents are having separate Christmases. Um, we had my dad's Christmas downtown and he, uh, didn't fucking tell us it was Christmas. Mm-hmm. And. He just was like, 'cause he's here all the time.
Yeah. And it was before, it was like two weeks before or whatever, and Yeah, like two weeks before Christmas and he was here. I missed Christmas because I was in a depression and I didn't know it was Christmas. Yeah. And my sister texted me and was like, it's Christmas. And I was like, what the fuck are you talking about?
No, it's not Christmas. Yeah. I don't have any presents wrapped. I'm not ready. Yeah. I'm so depressed. And then I'm like. I'm sure he did tell me it was Christmas and I just didn't remember. But he didn't. He didn't. Wow. And then my sister and I were talking and we're like, oh yeah, that's 'cause of mom. Yeah.
Like our mom. Handles everything. Yeah. Like she is so [00:15:00] good at letting everyone know what's going on the schedule. Like my mom, when we were kids, it used to drive me nuts because she would ask the same question so many times. Yeah. What time is dance? Okay, what time am I dropping? Where are you going? Right.
What day? And I'm like, yeah, you're doing that 'cause you have to get it in your head. 'cause you're the one that can controls this family. Yeah.
Zoe: Literally like
Heather : handles it. Yeah. But
Zoe: no, moms are amazing. Oh
Heather : yeah. I can't do it.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : It's
Zoe: amazing.
Heather : Yeah.
Zoe: My mom. Um, but then you had a different Christmas with your dad.
You did end up seeing him. Yeah,
Heather : we did have a nice, we had a Christmas before we went to Ottawa. Mm-hmm. To see my mom and that was nice. My dad and I got each other cashmere, aloe suits and then, ooh, we were just sitting around in our cashmere suits. You didn't know that he was gonna
Zoe: buy you one and then you bought him one?
Oh, no. We both
Heather : knew.
Zoe: Okay. That's funny. We both wanted aloe.
Heather : Yeah. Kashmir. Yeah. Pilling already. And I'm feeling like, are you drawing it? No, I just wore it twice and it's starting to pill and I'm feeling like, honestly I don't like aloe. I don't either, but I, because of the price point. Mm. Like I [00:16:00] know cashmere and I'm like, okay.
It's not like the best Yeah. Cashmere. 'cause I mean, Laura piano is like, Laura piano is like amazing cashmere. Okay. But it's so expensive. It's a $10,000 suit. Yeah. Which is why I kind of quit my job in retail. 'cause I was sick of selling $10,000 suits when I was. Making no money. Mm-hmm. And people were literally dying.
But I'm like a little disappointed that the price point is so high. I would be disappointed too, because
Zoe: it's not like aloe cashmere sets are cheap. No, I feel like they're
Heather : like probably like 400 for the top and bottom. Like it might be five. Yeah. And I'm like, dude, but. I dunno. You live in dude,
Zoe: dude, you live in, you know.
You know what expensive thing I got for Christmas?
Heather : Oh my God. The hairbrush?
Zoe: Yes. Oh my god. Is it, what is it? Borge, the Mason Pearson Hairbrush. Okay. Do you notice with boar bristles? Do you love it? Honestly. It's getting like my hair a little bit staticky, but I think it's because it's like new and it needs to like work my hair in It needs
Heather : to get like your oils [00:17:00] in there.
Yeah,
Zoe: I've heard that online that like, yeah, you can be a little staticky at first.
Heather : Yeah.
Zoe: But so like right now I'm not loving it. Mm-hmm. But I will report back in like a couple weeks and give an honest review when your hair, I'm sure I'm gonna like it because I. Can already feel that like it's stimulating my sculp more scalp.
Scalp. And it's not like ripping out my fucking hair like my plastic one is. So
Heather : when I was in the car on the way back from the cottage, yeah, I was so upset and I didn't even realize I had my hand in my hair and I was pulling my hair. There was like a chunk of hair in my hand. Oh no. And I was like, oh my God, this is like its own mental illness.
You cannot get in this habit. I'm like, fuck. But it was a lot and it was like quite jarring and I was like, no babe, I didn't
Zoe: even know I did it. Well, I'm sure because you were depressed the past couple weeks too, like your hair starts falling out, so like, and then you pull it. Yeah, it's falling out in the shower too, and I'm like, I usually don't do that.
I mean, [00:18:00] winter it's normal if everyone's hair is falling out. Is it? Yeah. Okay. Winter you shed, you lose a lot of hair.
Heather : Am I supposed to be putting any skincare on my head? Like what are we doing with our scalps? Like they're just nothing like it's just shampoo, conditioner, water, dry. Are you double shampooing?
Yeah, but I feel like there should be some sort of serum. Yeah.
Zoe: I mean, do you oil your scalp?
Heather : No, nothing Zoe. Okay. I don't know what to
Zoe: do. You can oil your scalp. Okay. You can do that once a week. Okay. And get like one of the hard plastic ones and like
Heather : rub it. Okay. I have that. Okay. I'm gonna get that helmet with the red light and we can get a,
Zoe: do you think that we should get the vibrant, the things that you stand on?
This is not a health and wellness podcast.
Heather : This is not a health and wellness podcast. This is a should we buy,
Zoe: but should we get, but should we get the thing that we stand on
Heather : and it shakes, this is a great call out. Okay. Okay. To mention my friend P. Our friend P. Mm-hmm. We'll link her episode here. She's a fitness and nutrition person.
Okay. What did she think? That's the whole thing. She's also. Pregnant and it's so cute. No, she looks amazing. No, I loved the [00:19:00] outfits that she posted the other day. She looks amazing. Yeah, I know those. And like
Zoe: her face isn't even
Heather : bloated. I know. I do not understand. I guess it's just like, I guess you have to keep working out when you're pregnant, I guess.
Well, she's like lifting. She like lifts her husband essentially.
Zoe: Oh my God.
Heather : I know. She lifted. She picked me up. I walked in. She just picked me up. I said, oh my God, Heather, you're here. Yeah. I said, you're pregnant. She said, child's play, but Paige was up. Paige, she said, I said, do I need that? Okay. And she said, Heather.
It's obviously bullshit. She said,
Zoe: girl, but is it good for like the lymphatic drainage or anything? That's what I said. Yeah. And she said
Heather : no.
Zoe: Okay. We're the same person.
Heather : Yeah. 'cause I'm like, I want anything that'll improve my life and longevity. Yeah. And she said no. She said that thing that used to have like the butt shaker back in like the fifties and she said, that's been disproven.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : Yes. This is for a different thing. That's for fat loss. This is for lymphatic drainage, she said, but the only way to really? Mm-hmm. You know, move your lymph nodes is to a work out and manually [00:20:00] move them. Yeah. Because like your lymph nodes don't have their own pump. So you like have to do like my lymph nodes in my armpits are swollen.
Yeah. Because they just, I don't, you know. Yeah. But she said no. She said it's a waste of money.
Zoe: Okay. Fine. Paige. I know. I was like a little mad. Even I was a little mad too because was like, I wanted something new to buy.
Heather : I. I know. I know. And, and that's exactly right. And that is exactly right to fill the board.
So he's like, so he's like, when are we getting a sauna at the cottage? And that's all I
Zoe: wanna
Heather : know. I wanna know it too. And my sister's on board, so that's good.
Zoe: Okay,
Heather : good. And then
Zoe: is your sister on board for a pool table?
Heather : I think if you said, Karen.
Zoe: Karen,
Heather : this is, does Karen listen to the podcast religiously?
Okay. Karen. Um, this is my pitch
Zoe: to you. Okay.
Heather : Zoe wants pool table. Zoe wants to play pool with you.
Zoe: I wanna play pool with you. Yeah. I also wanna teach you how to look cool playing pool. I wanna teach Heather how to look cool playing pool. I want us You don't think, you didn't think I looked cool? [00:21:00] No. Oh, it broke her heart Fucking news time.
I want us to be able to walk into a fucking bar and look at some guys and be like. US pool and us destroy these fucking men. Karen. That's all I want. That's
Heather : we're back, baby. Um, back to it. My mom called me yesterday. Mm-hmm. Two days ago. My mom, I love you. She doesn't listen to the pod. Mm-hmm. When we first started the pod.
Um, we were like very explicit, funny. We were like so excited. We're hilarious. Yeah, we are. And also like, we're not everyone's cup of tea and the shit that comes out of our mouth is like salacious. And I think my mom was expecting more professionalism. Yeah. I just think that she was expecting more from me.
Yeah. And if it's not. Expecting. Expecting more. Expecting more like professionalism. Yeah. And if it's not what she's [00:22:00] expecting, I think, and like this is how you get sober A to B. Yeah. Yeah. And I think A That's fine. Yeah. You can think whatever the podcast is, but when it isn't, what your expectations are. I think she felt like nervous for us.
Mm-hmm. Nervous for me. Probably a little like embarrassed. Yeah. 'cause her friends listen. Yeah. But. I was like, okay. I really had to go like, okay, this podcast is not for my mom. Yeah, it's not for your mom. It's not for my dad listens, but it's like, it's not for them. It's for, you know, us. Yeah. Our, our people.
It's for us five years ago. Yeah. That's exactly right. And I, I was okay with that and I was like, oh, that's a bummer that my mom like, thinks this, but thinks we're a bunch of sluts. Yeah. But also like. It's so important to the story. Yeah. Yeah. Like how we conduct ourselves. Like for sure as women it's so important and like, I dunno what that generation is about, but they are not fucking Yeah.
In the way we're fucking And that's okay. But yeah, my [00:23:00] mom called me two days ago crying. Well she wasn't like fully crying 'cause she's like a soldier, but like she was like sniffling. Yeah. Like her eyes were red. Mm-hmm. And I was like, oh, what's all this then? Mm-hmm. And she was like. I just listened to your podcast, like the New Year's episode.
Mm-hmm. And, which by the way, is one of my favorite episodes. Yeah. We've ever done watching it back. I was like, damn, I love you. Mm-hmm. Like, we're best friends. Yeah. We're best friends. But I, she listened to it and she was like. I'm just really proud of you girls. And like, she's like, you know, I only listened to the guest episodes.
Yeah. And she didn't wanna say like, why. Yeah, but she, 'cause she didn't wanna fight. Yeah. But she was like, I only listen to those. I like them. Yeah. She's like, but I listened to this one. And I just feel like she's like a, I think talking about my family and their Christmas. Mm-hmm. Like the Christmases. Yeah.
That was. Babe. Probably like
Zoe: healing for her. She, well, yeah.
Heather : And I think it kind of was. I think she was, I think she's probably been worried about everybody. Yeah. And how the family is gonna function and For sure. I think [00:24:00] she was just, it felt like she was just like, okay, now I don't have to worry about Heather.
It's like these girls, they know what they're doing. Yeah. It's good.
Zoe: Thanks mom. Yeah. And
Heather : it was really nice 'cause I feel like we fought about the podcast at some point. Yeah. And then it was like, I'm gonna keep doing this. Like you and me are gonna just Yeah. Regardless. Yeah. Yeah. And we have our intentions and like, you can come on if you want.
Yeah. But if you don't like it, you don't like it. But I just, I feel like she got it. Yeah. And I was like, yeah. I mean we did talk about anal at the end, but like, you know. Yeah. It's, I don't think she knows what pegging is. Look it up, mom.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : You'll learn a lot. Um, okay. So.
Zoe: So that's the holidays. So that's, I hope everyone's holidays was really fun and yeah, like
Heather : did you have a good New Year's?
Yeah.
Zoe: Heather, did you go out for New Year's? Because you said on the New Year's episode that you were gonna go
Heather : out. No. You said, do you think you're gonna come out with us? And I said, oh, don't, no. Mm. That's what I said. You put words into my mouth, you're a liar and you always have been. That's exactly right.
I honestly, I may have said I was gonna go, but I don't know either. [00:25:00] I feel like I might have made that up. I think I knew I wasn't gonna go. Yeah, it's so cold. It's also been really cold, but I don't wanna, I, I really love. Staying in and waking up early on January 1st and getting shit done. There's two types of people, a hundred.
There's two types of people and only two. And only two. And you fit into one of those boxes. Do you either to go out on
Zoe: New Year's or you stay in on New
Heather : Year's? And if you don't do either of those, then you have to go to an island Island with an uncontacted tribe and just
Zoe: Island Island. It's fun to go out every once in a while.
Yeah. And like, I can't believe I went to two locations on New Year's. No, literally. Literally. But I think next year I'm down for another house party. How was New Year's for you?
Heather : I'm trying to think if I would be down. I think I love the idea of a house party. What if I
Zoe: throw a house party for New Year's?
I'm sure. Yeah. Then obviously
Heather : Okay. Down I, um, sex in the city. Yeah. I, uh, I journaled a lot. I did, I like did some laundry. I thought about cleaning and organizing. I didn't do that. No. But I had a nice night with [00:26:00] my dog. Nice. And I did exactly what I wanted to do. I hung out with my boyfriend all day. Mm-hmm.
Um. Did he go out? No, I don't think so. Okay. He said he didn't. I don't know. I've never literally believed anyone ever. I'm like, if you are a person who likes to party and you didn't go out on New Year's, yeah. I'm like, are you lying to me or are we just, but whatever. Honestly, I'm depressed, so I can't tell yes and no.
But now we hung out that day. We like went to. We squashed. We went to play squash. 'cause he was like, oh, I was very depressed. And he was like, so I think that maybe it's time to try to move your, it's your body to move your body. Yeah. Yeah. That's great. And it was, yeah. Squash is really hard. Mm-hmm. Um. It's like kind of lame, but like watching them play, I am like, damn, these are fucking athletes.
Yeah. It's cool. It's hard. Yeah, it's not lame. They wear the glasses. Yeah. That's lame. That's lame. But
Zoe: like why do they, because like the ball can hit you in the eyes. Yeah. Yeah. 'cause
Heather : I was like lobbying it and they like fucking slice it and it's like, I'm like, does everything have to be, the fact [00:27:00] that, you know, the
Zoe: word lobby is hilarious.
Lobbing, you know, when you like lo
Heather : ball.
Zoe: No.
Heather : Lobit like lo it to me. I've never heard that. Bounce pass.
Zoe: I know that. I know. Bounce pass.
Heather : Should we play basketball this year? I wanna play football. Football. Okay. I want the lesbians to watch me throw a spiral. Do they play football? They play flag football. Okay.
I've been like flirting with them. I've been like peacocking a little bit. Yeah. Like do you need somebody? I'm sure it's
Zoe: okay. I can go over with them with, for you. I think we can act like we're lesbians so that they invite you in
Heather : or we could, the thing is like, I'm like, do we start our own sober flag football league?
But then I don't wanna be in charge of anything else.
Zoe: Is there enough sober people that wanna play flag football? No. There's like literally
Heather : gotta be. There's gotta be. Okay. But honestly, at the end of the day, I just really wanna throw the football back and forth between friends. That's all I wanna do too.
Which I think, yeah, we can just do that. The catty. Yeah, I think that's great. I [00:28:00] think it's important right now because we're a sober podcast to bring up the elephant in the room. Yeah, it's January, it's dry. January. Do you know anyone in your life that's doing dry January? No. No. Me neither. No, I, uh. I, no, actually, but I feel like I used to see it a lot.
I'm not really looking for it. I feel like everything on my feed is away from like those kinds of trends. And it's mostly just like sober stuff. Sober people. Yeah. Did you ever try to do January? No. Never crossed my mind.
Zoe: Yeah. Never crossed my mind. Try January? No. No. Did, do you know
Heather : anyone who's doing it or who does it?
No. No. Me either. I, I feel like I know peripherally people who do it. Yeah. I definitely thought I was gonna do it every single year for like a decade. Yeah. I was like, oh, dry January. And then I'm like, wait, but it's the big, there's so much to do. I know. Well, and January I have to eat. If I'm gonna eat, I'm gonna have to drink.
Zoe: January is like one of the most like depressing months too. Living in Canada. Yeah, because it's just cold. The holidays are done. Mm-hmm. So it's like, what [00:29:00] do we do now? Not drink. Yeah. That's crazy.
Heather : Yeah, it is really depressing. I wonder if like people feel this way in California. I think so, because you know what?
I think the problem with dry January is Yeah, tell me, tell me your thoughts. I think that for people who are really struggling, some people can do stuff like that. Yeah. Some people can do dry January, some people can do a 30 day juice cleanse. Some people can start running a marathon.
Zoe: No people that need to get sober are gonna do dry January.
Mm-hmm. The people who already like aren't drinking a lot are gonna be like, oh yeah, I'm doing dry January. Yeah. Like, it's those types of people that are doing it,
Heather : I think. I think some people do it and then they're like. Oh, I loved that. I'm not drinking anymore. Same uhhuh. I think it's a good
Zoe: gateway to get like to just like not drink all the time.
Do you? Kind of, because if you're doing dry January, as someone who doesn't drink a lot, then you're opening your mind to like, oh my God, mocktails are amazing. Oh my God, I don't need to drink every dinner I go to, what
Heather : do you call it in AA where it's like the three different kinds of [00:30:00] drunks,
Zoe: like type A type.
B and then an alcoholic. So
Heather : people who can like cut shit out like that. Yeah. Is like type B.
Zoe: Yeah. Okay. I think like there also is or, or like type A is like someone like can take or leave alcohol like whenever they want. Okay. Type B is someone who like drinks excessively, but when something like goes awry mm-hmm Like getting ending up in the hospital, getting arrested, you stop.
Yeah. I think but like type an alcoholic is you get in trouble and then you can't fucking stop.
Heather : Yeah. I think the good thing about dry January is that it. Um, I don't really know. I guess it like a, for us it's good 'cause it introduces non-alcoholic things and we're like, yay guys, we got 'em. Yeah.
Zoe: Hey, we're here.
Heather : But also cutting something out like that, and I can only speak for me as an addict. Yeah. Cutting out something like that is never about the thing. Mm-hmm. Cutting out, like cutting out alcohol in January. It's like, okay, but for what? Mm-hmm. Like are you trying to jumpstart your fitness? Are you trying to be.
Trendy. Are you trying to stop drinking? Mm-hmm. What are you [00:31:00] trying to do? Because at the end of it, if you make it through dry January now, where are we?
Zoe: Well, yeah, if you make it, if you are someone who drinks four times a week, uhhuh, and you do dry January and you make it through, then are you gonna drink excessively again?
Yeah. In February. Like what's the point of it? Yeah. Like then. Try to just do moderate drink two times a week instead of four times a week. Yeah. For the whole year, not just in January. Yeah.
Heather : And then I also wonder, people who do do dry January, to me it's a, you said do
Zoe: do,
Heather : I'm gonna clip that. Um, people who do dry January are, oh yeah.
I guess that you wouldn't say people who do do, yeah, people who do. Yeah.
Zoe: People. Oh my God, I'm the grammar police now. The one and only time I'm the grammar police. When Dodo is involved, do you feel good? Is this power gonna go to your head? This is gonna be horrible. It's, oh God, the power that I hold.
Heather : Here's what I will actually say about dry January. Okay? I get it. It's really [00:32:00] optimistic New Year's. I think
Zoe: that there's just like, there's two types of people. I
Heather : was like, I'm gonna say something about Dry January. I'm sorry. And you're like, actually
Zoe: me. There's the two types of people. Would you agree?
Only two. Going back to the two types,
Heather : only two
Zoe: that do dry January. The ones who are like already health and wellness year. Gonna use it against people to be like, I'm doing Judge January. Oh, make sure everyone knows I'm doing Judge January. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like there's that type of person. Or there's like the low key alcoholic who wants everyone to know that they can go for a month without sobriety.
Heather : That is a good point. I also think that the people who are health and wellness doing dry January, if I feel like you're throwing it in my face, 'cause you're health and wellness, that's my fucking problem. I think. I think because when I was an addict, right? When I was in it, and I would see people doing that, or I would see people working out or I'd see those like, transform your body.
I did this. Mm-hmm. I'd be like, fuck you. You don't get it. Yeah. But they are going through their own thing and for whatever reason they're doing, doing dry January.
Zoe: But I think that like for some people it must just be like so easy to do dry January because some [00:33:00] people just like don't drink every day.
Heather : Oh my God.
My dad, when I stopped drinking, he stopped drinking and he's like, yo, the only time I really miss it is like when I'm cooking. I like love to have, you know, I love to, he likes to be romantic with his dinners and just like drink some wine. Romanticize everything. Yeah. My dad,
Zoe: your dad.
Heather : But now he doesn't do that and he's like over all that.
Yeah. But um, I think. What I will say is dry January is hard. Mm-hmm. And it is hard for a reason and there are some of us who can't do it. Yeah. And it, you will fail day one. Yeah. Fail. It's just not possible for some people. And, and then you gotta look deeper. Yeah. And I think the optimism of New Year's.
Yeah. I had that every year. These are the, the goals I'm gonna have. I'm gonna write the, I never wrote anything down, but I was thinking them in my bed, in my head, and I'm like, I'm never gonna drink again. And you do. And you feel like a failure. Yeah. It's not a great way to start off the year. It really is a recipe for disaster.
And if you can't do dry January, that's okay, [00:34:00] but we gotta talk, we gotta figure out why you can't do dry January. Yeah. Because you should be able to. Yeah. If you're a person who drinks and doesn't have a problem, you should be able to cut out alcohol for a full month. Totally. And it not change your lifestyle that much.
Totally. So if
Zoe: anything, it will like just, I think. If you are someone who doesn't drink that much and you can do genuine, no problem.
Heather : Mm-hmm.
Zoe: Yeah. It opens up your mind to the fact that you can go out to a dinner, to a party. Yeah. And drink your non-alcoholic stuff and have a fucking good time. Like that would be mind opening for, for me if I didn't have a problem with it.
You know? That's
Heather : a really good point actually, because I'd imagine dry January feels to people like, okay, I can't go out. Yeah. I'm not gonna see my friends like this whole month, oh, Heather's not drinking this month, so she's not coming out. It's like. Dry January probably should be. Do everything the same as you were.
Exactly. Same. Go out with your friends party, stay up too late, watch a show, have sex, everything without alcohol. Yeah, that's the challenge.
Zoe: That is the challenge. I agree. I agree that that [00:35:00] should be it. Mm-hmm. I was talking to someone who recently like stopped drinking just for a few months and they were telling me that a lot of their friends, like haven't been inviting her out because she doesn't drink anymore, and she's like, babe, I can still go out.
Right, right. It's just not women not drinking, you know? Yeah.
Heather : Interesting.
Zoe: Yeah. Yeah. Even though your friends are sober. Still invite them out. Oh my God. Yeah, because they might still wanna come out. No, guys,
Heather : I really like give them the
Zoe: option. I like to be included. I invite her everywhere she comes 20% of the time.
Okay.
Heather : Yeah. Yeah. I would say, depending on what we're talking about, if we're talking about like after hours things, parties, then your boys probably not going then zero. But dinners, I go to dinner. Yeah. No dinners. Yeah. I love dinner.
Zoe: I was talking more like party types of scenarios. 20%. 20%.
Heather : I've been to one
Zoe: for 30 minutes.
You've been to
Heather : three? Three what? Three barbecue. My birthday and Q's party. Yeah, so two of them. My mom was there and she brought me with her. [00:36:00] Are we doing a. No, you already had your birthday and your sober birthday. It's me. It's you. Next baby. It's you. Next. I'm next.
Zoe: Okay. Sober news, sober news, Diddy and the Nickelodeon guy feel my heart right now.
Wow. Did you want me to just feel your boob? Also, I take back what I said about who, what celebrity I'm bringing in into 20. Oh my, oh God, I love it. Okay. What dropping Timothy Chala? Me bringing in Robbie Hoffman. Oh, I love that bitch. Timothy Chalamet. I honestly didn't like Marty Supreme that much. I get it.
I don't think that movie is my type of movie. Yeah. And I think just the hype was way too overdone. Yeah. And it's just another fucking man doing whatever he can do to get [00:37:00] what he wants. Yeah. Like, well, yeah. Do we really need to that type of movie right now, guys?
Heather : Um, really. You know what? This is what this is.
Seeing flaws in the people that you love and look up to, and that's a responsible consumer of media. Yeah. Because we can't just love everything somebody does. Or you buy a red hat and then you just like hate trans people for no reason. It's very confusing.
Zoe: Like Timothy Shaw might go back to making shit like beautiful boy, or Call me by your name and I will love you again.
But Martys another white man just doing whatever the fuck he can do to get what he wants. No
Heather : Tamia Chalamet. If you don't put your dick in a peach. Within immediacy, we're gonna have a big problem. We're
Zoe: have a big problem. We're gonna have a big problem. Robbie Hoffman. Oh my God. Hilarious. I want Rivka.
Know everything about their fucking life. Oh my God. Oh my God. I would, I would love to know everything. Oh my God. Oh my
Heather : God. Rivka Rivka Hoffman.
Zoe: If you want. Look her up on Netflix and watch their special Damn.
Heather : And also their wife, Gabby, Wendy. That's like how I knew about Robbie. Did you watch Gabby's season of The Bachelor?
No. Damn. [00:38:00] So good. So cute. Yeah. I wanna talk about Diddy. Yeah. So we, okay. First of all, fuck that guy.
Zoe: Fuck Diddy.
Heather : Fuck that guy forever. Fuck that guy, and fuck all of his friends. Yeah. And that's a point I wanna bring up. Yeah. My initial thoughts of the doc are a, I'm traumatized. Mm-hmm. Or no, I wouldn't say traumatized.
A I'm triggered as fuck. Mm-hmm. B. I am not surprised or shocked at all. I listened to 50 cent on Good Morning America and he's talk about what you like,
Zoe: what you mean. Okay. What you think about 50 cent, because I think that was a really cool like perspective 50 cent. First of all, thank you so much for saying that.
Heather : 50 cent. I think it's so cool that he's taking down Diddy. Mm-hmm. We need that.
Zoe: This stock wouldn't be created without [00:39:00] Diddy's or without 50 cents hatred towards me. Yeah. Which is cool. Yeah. Which is amazing.
Heather : But they obviously have like rat beef. Yeah. Which. Honestly, watching the Diddy doc, all your rap beef is fucking stupid.
Mm-hmm. This documentary was not about victims. This documentary was not about 50 cent. Didn't make, in my opinion, didn't make this doc to get victims compensated, or, you know, really expose them. Mm-hmm. And show that they're here and they're real. Yeah. And this is what's happening in the industry. This doc was about all the shit that Diddy's done and his lies and his like, rise to power and just the criminal activity he's done.
Mm-hmm. And all of the criminal activity was in the same vein, in the same breath. And I, and, and 50 cent isn't perfect. 50 cent has sexual assault allegations from his exes. He has, you know, allegations against him of, of, of, of all kinds of things. [00:40:00] Battery, sexual assault. So he's not perfect either. And that makes me feel like your motivation for this doc, I mean, a, let's say it's like your come to Jesus moment and I hurt people in my past, and so I wanna take this shit down, never let it happen again.
Mm-hmm. That's not what this was. Well, he didn't say that. He didn't say that. Yeah. This was to take down Diddy. Everyone in that dock, all the victims are fucking collateral damage. Because this was not a trauma informed documentary. Yeah. In my perspective. No. It just, you're right. It it so fast with the sexual assault, it just was like, this happened, this happened, this happened, and it's we're seeing video footage, we're seeing all this shit on Cassie and I.
Oh my God. Yeah. This is not informed at all. Yeah. Like this is just about taking him down. I felt so
Zoe: bad for Cassie. Holy shit. The whole time. And then like, so proud of Cassie the whole time.
Heather : Mm.
Zoe: But yeah, I agree. It was definitely like, not for the victims, it was for taking down Diddy. [00:41:00] Um, I think, I'm glad he did the doc though.
I'm glad we saw that. I'm glad we, I Someone else will need to do
Heather : another doc. Mm-hmm. Have you seen that? There's a new doc coming out this year about, about his kids. They're, they're like making the doc. They're making the doc. Yeah. Like in response. Oh my god. I will say his kids, his daughters are like 18.
Zoe: Yeah. Well the son is just as bad as Diddy.
Heather : Yeah. But the daughters are 18. That's how old Cassie was when she got with Diddy. Yeah. So people in court are like praising these kids. Mm-hmm. Feeling bad for these kids. Empathy. Empathy. Yeah. The daughters, the son is a piece of shit. Yeah. Listen. We can talk about gener generational trauma.
And his son is also a victim. Yeah. But his daughters, they're victims too. Mm-hmm. And I really hope that Diddy found them too precious to touch. Yeah. But at this point, who knows? Who knows? But we gotta compare like Cassie to his daughters. Yeah. I'm like, [00:42:00] she's going through way worse. Yeah. She's gone through way worse than them.
Yeah. So fuck off with their empathy. Yeah. They shouldn't even been in court. Yeah. They should not have been there to hear No. To hear what their dad has done 'cause they don't believe it. Yeah. And then it's like you're hearing all this bullshit. It's trauma. He doesn't care or they,
Zoe: I,
Heather : the
Zoe: sun
Heather : knows everything.
The sun's been there throughout it all. I know. I feel like the sun is so brainwashed, first of all. Yeah. He's also been given the keys to the castle. Yeah. He was like born into an empire. Yeah. That's created on lies and yeah. Crime.
Zoe: So him, he. Let's talk about the alcohol and the, yeah, like addiction of it all.
Let's do that. Um, he got into. They talk about how he like never smoked weed. How growing up he was like hanging out with all these rappers and like he never wanted to touch weed, he didn't like it, whatever. And then he said something like he, yeah,
Heather : he like was too good for
Zoe: it or something. Yeah. He was too good for it.
Yeah. And then he broke his shoulder or something. What happened? No, he was
Heather : [00:43:00] with was he went with Cassie, slid his wrist. Someone slid his wrist, right? Yes. Yes. And then he was bandage and given Percocet. Yes. Which is an opioid. That's what, yeah.
Zoe: Then, and then I guess like he's, he started doing all drugs after he got introduced to parts.
Essentially
Heather : it like
Zoe: kicked off his addiction. His addiction.
Heather : Yeah. Watching the doc. I know they said he didn't do any drugs before for some reason. That's really hard for me to believe, but some people don't. Like Donald Trump is like the worst. And he like says he's never had any alcohol.
Zoe: Yeah. So let's believe that.
For what It okay if they, if they, if that's what they say. Yeah. Let's believe that for a second. Mm-hmm. I mean, it's an easy, like perks. It's an easy introduction to the whole world of it. Yeah. You know, I, for that to be like, the first drug that you really get addicted to is crazy.
Heather : Yeah. So what a Percocet does, is it, it's a painkiller.
Mm-hmm. But it also alters your mood. Mm-hmm. So it takes away all of your anxiety that it's pain, right? [00:44:00] It's your pain receptors and it just calms you down and you feel. Kind of numb. Yeah. And getting addicted to opiates. Mm-hmm. You are at this state as somebody who was an opiate taker. Mm-hmm. You're at this state of like, nothing, nothing, nothing.
Yeah. And so you can't really work like that. Right. So you gotta take more shit. Shit. More shit. Yeah. But you wanna take that. Yeah. And it's a really nice high. Yeah. 'cause you really feel.
Zoe: Calm and not high. Well, he probably like loved that feeling and then Yeah. Needed other things because by the end of it he was probably doing a concoction of
Heather : pink drugs.
Yeah. Blue drugs up the ass. All this shit. Yeah. Like, oh my god, like
Zoe: so much. Okay. How do you like even make, like I don't even have. The ability to like have the perfect like concoction of drugs to like make me feel like the best ever.
Heather : Right. I would have [00:45:00] people on their team to do that. To do that for them.
Yeah.
Zoe: Yeah. Like to find your perfect thing, to find your perfect balance to like dose you out throughout the day. Yeah. It's a day. Yeah. Yeah. It's
Heather : really. That's so deep in Yeah. Deep. Like that is so deep, deep into where you're now. Like John Malaney said this too. He was like, I know exactly what I need to take to go up.
I know exactly what I need to go down and I need to know what I need to be base level. Mm-hmm. And like he knew that, but I don't feel like watching him. I don't feel like he had any fucking control. Yeah. I think drugs are the worst thing that could have happened to him. Yeah. I will say if he came out and was like, sorry, I have a drug issue.
Yeah. And I take it all back and I apologize and I wanna make amends. No, it's too far. He gets too, you're too far gone. You know why I feel that is because A, he's a piece of shit. But also that video, that part in the dock where he hosted that celebrity basketball game. Yes. And then all those people got like wedged into the door and died, trampled the video footage of him standing in the middle of the [00:46:00] gym.
Kind of like looking around. Yeah. And his like white outfit. You know what that reminds me of? When serial killers or murderers show up to the crime scene. Yeah. Oftentimes when someone goes missing and there's a search party, the assailant is there. Yeah. Because they wanna be close to it. They wanna see it.
It's like part of their art and their craft. And so him like wa looking around like that. To me it felt like I did this. Yeah. And not in a, oh fuck, I did this. Yeah. Because then they go to the hotel, he's with, um, Kirk, his friend. Yeah. Sad. And his mom. And his mom is like, what the fuck are we gonna do now?
And then he slapped his mom.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : And I'm like, oh, you don't give a shit about fuck. Like no one can Can like doubt you. Yeah. Or talk to you about anything. You're just like the king of all of this. And you don't care who lives or dies.
Zoe: And I think you're right. I think that is like. An insane person from the get go.
But like it's, it is [00:47:00] just weird to think because they do talk about him in like such a different way of like when he was starting mm-hmm. To when. It just like when it went too far. Like what was that line that was crossed is what I'm curious about. But again, I think I take that back a little bit because it seems like he was always manipulating people even when he was starting to get to the top.
Yeah, I, you know, that's a good, that's a
Heather : good question because he didn't seem shy. No, he seemed very ambitious. Yeah. It didn't feel like he had much self doubt. No. It seemed like he wanted something and he got it and. To me, it feels like in the beginnings of things, when you're moving up in life, you're super empathetic.
You want to help, you want people to, you don't wanna be cool with people. You wanna get in their good graces. Mm-hmm. And then something happens and he is like, fuck you, I'm the king.
Zoe: Yeah. Just he was always using the people to get to the top, and then he was on the top and made sure that no one else could ever get above him.
Heather : Yeah.
Zoe: And I think
Heather : that leads me to [00:48:00] the question of everyone around him. Yeah. And a lot of times, I mean, at the beginning of the doc I texted you, I didn't, I didn't watch the end of it yet. Yeah. Like I did now. Yeah. But, and I, and I was like, fuck these people. Yeah. Fuck his friends. Fuck that guy. Fuck Kirk.
Kirk is the worst. You're his best friend since childhood and you're just like letting your boy do all of this shit. Yeah.
Zoe: Okay. But when you watched the first two episodes Yeah. I did talk to you about how like it does make me nervous. Yeah. Like even our favorite boy. D Shepherd I know is best friends with Ashton Kutcher.
Quiet, quiet, quiet. Who was best
Heather : friends with Diddy? Like, I'm sorry, but people like Ellen who just like left the country. Yeah. George Clooney just got his citizenship to France. Yeah. Like he's moving out because he said he doesn't want his kids to be up in the Hollywood shit. And I'm like, homie, what do you know?
No. What did you do now you guys? And it just, if they knew anything or if they don't. Ellen did. I'm like. You guys are doing the exact same thing. Yeah. Enable, enable, enable, and then [00:49:00] run away. Yeah. And leave the victims to Then, here's the thing about the victims. So many people don't believe them. And I'm like, you're asking a victim who was drugged 20 years ago mm-hmm.
And told that they were assaulted. Yes. On video. You have to then remember everything about that day. Mm-hmm. How much you drank, what day it was, what time it was, what you were wearing, what he was wearing, what you said. You are then putting all of that shit onto victims, and if they don't have the correct answers, Diddy walks.
Yeah. Okay.
Zoe: Oh,
Heather : it's 2026.
Zoe: We have to start believing,
Heather : but this is right on the heels or in the pant leg of Epstein. Yeah. I'm like, we're just, and sometimes I watch these videos and I'm like, or watch what's going on with all this? And I'm like. They think we're so fucking stupid. Yeah. They think like, and there are people out here who will defend Diddy till the day he dies.
I mean, those fucking jurors, which like guys, guys. But they shouldn't have even had a jury. I don't know why they have a jury. I think you can elect to have a jury or the judge can [00:50:00] decide. I feel like the judge
Zoe: had decided for the, um, OHL boys to not have the jury because there was too much like Yeah.
Commotion and I don't know. So the judge probably could have been like, yo, no, everyone knows Diddy. How is there gonna be a jury that's not,
Heather : and I don't know how it works in California. Like, I don't know, based on what? Don't have shit about, fuck. Yeah. Like, I don't know if there has to be a jury, but the thing about the jurors are like, yeah, they're gonna piss everybody off because they're defending him.
Mm-hmm. But that is like. That is the law. Mm-hmm. You are subject to the court of public opinion, to the jury's opinion, and that is the best way. Mm-hmm. To decide. Mm-hmm. Because he can't pay them. Mind you, he was like looking back and like Exactly. Making eye contact with people. Are you kidding me? If Dax Shepherd shot a man in front of me and then was in court and winked at me, I would say.
Hold on. I need to take a second because I need to change. I'm planned to her. Yeah. I'm confused now. Like that's a celebrity that I love and got [00:51:00] me sober, so like, oh no. But that, yeah, that whole thing pisses me off, but the people around him. Mm-hmm. Getting to the final episode and all of those men that were assaulted, just like sometimes I would, little Rod who was like, sometimes I wake up and it's a girl in my bed sometimes it's Diddy.
Yeah. That makes me so sickened and it's like. What more did you want? Mm-hmm. You got the best producers, you got the best writers, you got the best people around you, but now you have to drug and fuck them. Mm-hmm. Because you don't have enough. It's like not enough power. Yeah. You have to have more and it's like, holy shit.
He's not the richest person in the world, so it's not super money motivated. Mm-hmm. It seems power motivated, I think.
Zoe: Yeah. It's like the control and having whatever he wants and never having enough. It's a sex addiction is what it is. [00:52:00] I think, yeah. Part of it is got to be a sex addiction because sex addicts like, have to have like five different women in a day.
Yeah. And like do all this crazy shit. And like, it's like more and more it's, it's always the next thing. It's the same. Like, it's the same with regular addiction. It's always like. Better, not better alcohol, but like throughout the day more or whatever.
Heather : Yeah,
Zoe: it's safe and you're always pushing your tolerance, always pushing the limits to everything.
And I think that is what a sex addict is too. Yeah, so I think he definitely had a sex addiction, has a sex addiction and I think he's definitely an addict for drugs and alcohol as well. Yeah. And. Definitely has a bunch of mental illness shit and Yeah. But at his core, I do believe that he is an evil person.
I do too. I think he's demonic.
Heather : Yeah. And I don't know where that started. I, his dad was a hustler. His dad died young. His mom? His his mom. Yeah. But I'm like, did they make you [00:53:00] that bad? Yeah. Like what traumatized you when you were a kid? There's something
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : Where, but honestly, this feels so clear that it's just like an ego thing.
It's like, but it's, it's also just
Zoe: so sad to me that when he comes out, everything's gonna be like back to normal. Well,
Heather : that's what I'm wondering. Um, Charlemagne was. He'll never work again. No one's gonna work with him. And I'm like, I don't believe that. Are you kidding me? Yeah. Like, yeah, he will. It was, uh, a very upsetting doc.
I think I was like, uh, uh, I get really, you know me, I get triggered when people around. Mm-hmm. Don't put a stop to something. Mm-hmm. Then realizing at the end that all these kids that grew up into men and women that Diddy was with were all so young and doing their fucking best as kids. I know. And they were from Harlem, like those kids were from the Bronx and Harlem and back then, especially, and now it's like you have to look for an opportunity to get out.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : And they did. And he just happened to be a master fucking [00:54:00] manipulator and he knew that they needed him. Yeah. So. It's a perfect recipe for a cult leader disaster. Yeah. You know, beating up your girlfriend in multiple of your girlfriends outside in public, in front of other people, and then looking at them and saying, you're not gonna do shit.
Damn. We're far past it now. Yeah.
Zoe: Yeah. No, that's like ultimate manipulation. Ultimate control. Yeah. Um, ultimate abuse, like Yeah. Um, it, yeah, it made me sick to my stomach. It. Like, come on world, please. I know. Come on. I know. It's like, it's like, what else has to be out there? What else? Like what do we need?
We've already seen him physically abuse her. I know. What else do we need to see? Yeah, I, I, I don't know. I don't know what we need to see because I think if we seen anymore, I don't think anything different would happen. [00:55:00]
Heather : Mm mm It's very confusing, upsetting, and always on the woman. Like people are even saying like, Cassie stayed.
I'm like, Cassie had, how could Cassie leave? Yeah, that's like R Kelly's victims. Like they're not just gonna leave. Yeah. But it's a bummer. The whole thing was a bummer. And drugs and alcohol in this case, I really don't what I think. I think Diddy's use of drugs and alcohol allowed him to act further on his demonic ways.
Yeah. I think he was gonna get there anyway, but I think this just like let him go for hours and like not give a fuck about anything. Yeah. You
Zoe: know?
Heather : No. Can you
Zoe: imagine having sex for more
Heather : than an hour? No. No. No, no. Sometimes we're on the third position and I'm like,
Zoe: yeah.
Heather : I'm like, I'm about to fake it so that you'll come.
Yeah. Like this is crazy.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : But no, and then having sex and then having the shit kicked outta me. I can't imagine that either.
Zoe: [00:56:00] No.
Heather : But I'm really proud of Cassie and I was, was, I'm proud
Zoe: for all of the victims that did say something in the
Heather : doc. Um, and the men, I'm very proud of the men for saying that because yeah.
You don't see that. Yeah. Yeah. You don't see that. You see it with the women. You understand it. You're young, you're impressionable, now you're trapped with this guy. Mm-hmm. When it's the men. Mm-hmm. It's shocking. Yeah. But it, it. It's like not their fault at all. And like working with Diddy, after you have woken up and your ass is sore and he's beside you and you still work with him, what are you gonna do?
Mm-hmm. You're so deep into it now. Mm-hmm. Where like he had you mm-hmm. Drugged, like, you're so deep in you're not leaving. Mm-hmm. So I think, I think it was a really good expose on like the victims, and I'm glad that they spoke their truth.
Zoe: Do you think that Diddy took a playbook from Epstein? That's a good question.
Do you like all these bad men? Like talk about like what they [00:57:00] do for, like what pills they give people? Like what, you know, what, what they give
Heather : them. Unfortunately, I think it just happens so often. Mm-hmm. I don't think they're talking to each other at all. Yeah. I think there's like an inherent thing with men sometimes that is like power.
Mm-hmm. Women, all of it. Yeah. And I think that. That'll lead you to the same acts. Mm-hmm. Epstein and Diddy just taking whatever they want.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : I don't think they talk to each other at all.
Zoe: Yeah,
Heather : they should have. They got a lot in common. They got a lot
Zoe: in common. They could have been besties. Damn.
Heather : Yeah.
Well, first episode of 2026, we hate the men. Still. Don't you worry. Don't you worry. You're not getting away with shit. No. And we're still not doing the NHL. Thank you very much. No, we'll never be doing the NHL. Do you have any final words for 2026 before we depart for the day? Final words
Zoe: for 2026. [00:58:00] Um, fuck Diddy.
Yeah.
Heather : Fuck. Did he believe Woman fuck Diddy and. Robbie Hoffman, you gotta do another show in Toronto because your tickets are sold out except for like really random obstructed seats. And we keep doing that.
Zoe: Robbie. We
Heather : love, love you
Zoe: love,
Heather : and we understand that you're a married woman, okay? But like we love you.
We understand that it has never stopped us before, but I think that because you're married to a woman, we're not gonna infiltrate and like we can all just be like best friends to hang out. I would love that. Yeah. I would literally love that.
Zoe: I just wanna know all your childhood trauma because it seems like there's a lot to unpack and I'm like so into it.
Heather : No, and like literally you're from Canada, so like. Come here.
Zoe: Yeah.
Heather : Okay. Well, we love you guys. Thank you so much for following us into this new year. We cannot wait. I literally can't wait for this year. It's, yeah. There's lots to be done. There's lots to be done. Thank you for sticking
Zoe: with us. Mm-hmm. And we love you.
We're proud of you. So proud of you. Bye.
Heather : You. Oh my God. Proud of you. I'm proud of you too. Let's, okay, we'll keep it like that. Proud of it like that. I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you. [00:59:00] 2026. I'm so proud of you. I've been proud. My hand is really sweaty. You wanna touch it? Nah, it's okay. You have to touch it.
Zoe: Oh, I love
Heather : you. It's warming. So clammy. I love you. Yeah, right. I love you. Wanna touch my armpits? No. What about in between my thighs? That's enough. Proud of you. Proud of you. Bye. Bye.
Thanks for listening to Girl Undrunk. You can follow us on Instagram and TikTok at Girl Undrunk Podcast and or send me an email at heather@girlundrunk.com.
This episode was proudly produced by Consciously Produced LLC.
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